If Paris Hilton has been given the chance to start a singing career.
So let's break down her attempt at singing: the song Stars are Blind, and the accompanying video.
Now we all know Paris Hilton makes great (ahem) videos, and to all you porno fans out there, this one is no exception. Though personally, if I'd wanted to watch Paris Hilton rolling around nearly naked with a dude, I'd have gotten the 1 Night in Paris DVD. Besides, the frolicking-on-a-beach bit has been done before, by Britney, and I think, Mariah. Minus 1000 pogi points for a lack of originality.
Now, the singing, which sounds like a cheap knock-off of Gwen Stefani. I mean, come on. Still, plus 1000 pogi points for her vocal coach. Unless there's some Milli Vanilli shit going on here (read: someone else is singing and she's just lip-synching).
And the lyrics. I thought I'd seen inane crap after reading bunches of Tim Yap articles in the super-crappy Inquirer Super!, but this takes the cake. A sample:
Even though the gods are crazy
Even though the stars are blind
If you show me real love baby
I'll show you mine
I can make you nice and naughty
Be the devil and angel too
Got a heart and soul and body
Let's see what this love can do
Baby I'm perfect for you
Wahaha! My gawd! Minus 1000 pogi points for shit lyrics. And P.S. Paris, anyone who's seen 1 Night in Paris has seen "yours," which, according to wikipedia.org is "one of the most explicit celebrity sex videos, showing clear vaginal penetration, fellatio, and ejaculation — as well as Hilton interrupting sex to answer her mobile phone, which led to a number of parodies." So you needn't offer to "show us yours" anymore hehe.
So let's add 'em all up: -1000 pogi points + 1000 pogi points... Oh wait, yeah, we gave that to her vocal coach. So, -1000 pogi points - 1000 pogi points = -2000 pogi points! Woohoo!
Hay naku. Abyssmal, to say the least. But you know people are stupid enough to eat this crap up. Smart already has some kind of ringtone/call back tone promo going on for this song. Corporations are gods talaga. They can turn even the most talent-less ditzes into superstars.
If I'd known making a sex video would get one this famous, I might have tried it.
Saturday, July 22, 2006
Monday, July 03, 2006
Top Eight Ito!!!
You'll just have to allow me this moment of obnoxious self-indulgence. After clawing my way through seven years of college, to have this waiting for me at the end is just wonderful.
Yes, I'm talking about my board exam. As in I am number eight in the entire frickking country!!! I am the eighth highest social work board passer in the entire Philippines!
Man, and after the horrible first exam (of four), I would've been happy to just have passed the gods-damned exam. I never, ever expected to get anywhere in the Top Ten.
P.S. Yes, to be a social worker, you have to take a four-year B.S. in Social Work and pass a national board exam. You aren't a social worker just because you're working/you've worked in an NGO :-P.
Hay, of course, I owe this to many, many other people. My parents and their infinite patience and support, financial and otherwise. My profs (except one) and my classmates, for the knowledge and moral support. And all my friends from even before I transferred to Social Work (halloo Kule pips!), who know all about the math-and-chem-singko ickiness I went through to get here, and who've helped me to carry on. And I'd like to think that, despite whatever issues we may have, Someone Else was watching over me. I guess it is true: Even the most un-religious person needs to call out to... Someone, in their hour of need. Many thanks.
Yes, I know this is all very incredible. Super-singko, Hari ng Incomplete, perenially-late/absent, incredibly delayed, delinkwente Ajeet is Top Eight? But it's true hehe. Of course, the PRC website is (still) down, and the lists on newspaper websites are just of the board passers, not of the Top Ten, so you're just going to have to take my word for it. Unless you can scrounge up the Saturday edition of the Manila Bulletin. My mom has already stowed our copy away.
Yes, I'm talking about my board exam. As in I am number eight in the entire frickking country!!! I am the eighth highest social work board passer in the entire Philippines!
Man, and after the horrible first exam (of four), I would've been happy to just have passed the gods-damned exam. I never, ever expected to get anywhere in the Top Ten.
P.S. Yes, to be a social worker, you have to take a four-year B.S. in Social Work and pass a national board exam. You aren't a social worker just because you're working/you've worked in an NGO :-P.
Hay, of course, I owe this to many, many other people. My parents and their infinite patience and support, financial and otherwise. My profs (except one) and my classmates, for the knowledge and moral support. And all my friends from even before I transferred to Social Work (halloo Kule pips!), who know all about the math-and-chem-singko ickiness I went through to get here, and who've helped me to carry on. And I'd like to think that, despite whatever issues we may have, Someone Else was watching over me. I guess it is true: Even the most un-religious person needs to call out to... Someone, in their hour of need. Many thanks.
Yes, I know this is all very incredible. Super-singko, Hari ng Incomplete, perenially-late/absent, incredibly delayed, delinkwente Ajeet is Top Eight? But it's true hehe. Of course, the PRC website is (still) down, and the lists on newspaper websites are just of the board passers, not of the Top Ten, so you're just going to have to take my word for it. Unless you can scrounge up the Saturday edition of the Manila Bulletin. My mom has already stowed our copy away.
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