Alcohol-free

Not.

I don't know what to do with people who don't drink. It's like meeting a kid who doesn't like chocolates or video games or cartoons.

What do they do for fun? Oh I'm sure there's a whole list of fun, wholesome things to do like doing math and going to mass, but alcohol is FUN. Like fun-fun, real-fun. And it makes you fun. Even if you're the most uptight, repressed character around, beer loosens the tongue (and body) and pretty soon, you're dancing on a table or stroking someone's thigh inappropriately or something.

I met someone some time back who told me he didn't drink or go out on gimiks. So what am I expected to do with such people? Suffice it to say our interaction since hasn't been substantial.

Booze, I find, is a universal thing. No matter how different the people I meet are, once I find out they're boozehounds too, we get along fine. Many of my longest friendships have been forged in the furnace that is the hours-long drinking session.

I started crazily, of course, like any newbie teenage drinker. There were the gimiks where I went nuts and ordered lots of different drinks, and ended up laughing at my reflection in the bathroom, or talking loudly at scared bartenders, or passing out, or spewing chunks. Eventually, as I approached my current age, I settled on beer. Tequila and vodka are fine, gin a big no-no (hate the peppery taste), cocktails are alright, I suppose, when clubbing. But beer... ah. Beer's the drink that settles on you like a warm haze and tells you that everything's going to be alright. And even when you feel like throwing up, it's still telling you that. Gotta love something that lies to you so well.

And my love for beer has increased over the past few months. Before, I just had Red Horse. Then my dear, dear GX friends introduced me to the wonders of Carling and Fosters (and cider, but that's a whole other hangover). And since I got back, my dad's showed me the awesomeness that comes from a can of German beer. My faves right now are Kapuziner and Oettinger.

'Course now, I seem to have less opportunities for drink, which makes my liver sad. Everyone's off doing their own thing, and getting all my friends together in one place needs committee-level planning nowadays. 'Tis not good for me, coming off a volunteering experience where I was boozed up and clubbing with some awesome people half the time.

So if you don't drink, don't tell me about it. And if you do, let's get me good and wasted! Me needs a good pub crawl soon.